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How a Wound from a Friend Brings Healing

By September 12, 2016April 24th, 2022Christian Living5 min read

As we seek to grow daily in our personal relationships with God, we can all suffer from a critical blindness of sorts. It is not the “blind leading the blind into a ditch” kind of darkness, but rather an inability to clearly perceive and navigate how we are actually doing in our lives spiritually, emotionally, physically and relationally with God and with others. We quite often are under the delusion that we’re at the center of our personal universe. We could call this attitude “a blind spot” of sorts.

Now to be completely transparent, at any given time, we are lost among a plethora of “blind spots.”

We, each of us, are formulating new directions and making life choices as we live our lives. Unfortunately, most of the time we are in complete ignorance of the vortices of destruction that would gladly swallow us whole and bring us to complete ruin, given the simplest misstep on our part. I suppose that ignorance truly is bliss considering how scary that sounds.

Because of these blind spots, we need to have close personal accountability with our families and other believers who are mature enough in the Lord to help us navigate the darkness floating around in our personalities, which have formed over time either by nature or by nurture. Remember what the Apostle Paul wrote, “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life” (Galatians 6:7–9). The law of sowing and reaping is not a respecter of our person and will never feel compassion on us because we did something in ignorance. It does not care if we didn’t know what we were doing was going to cause ourselves or others a world of pain and discomfort. It simply brings home what we have sown, good or bad. I personally never enjoy it when the doorbell rings and there is the big ugly shadow of bad news standing there, demanding to come in and bring its party of wreckage and pain. I can lock the door, pull the shades, but it will never go away because I created the device of my own destruction, because of my lack of humility in staying accountable for myself to God and others who love me.

We each need people in our lives who love us and are courageous enough and willing to brave the scary darkness of our souls to help us avoid the strongman that awaits to mug us around each of life’s corners.

We need someone who is willing and able to walk with us and wound us for our own good when needed.

Trust me, we all need it, someone who has complete access and permission to poke around and see what is not right or maybe things that are starting to slip. If you think it would be uncomfortable, embarrassing and painful to have someone do that for you, you would be correct. The book of Proverbs states, “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Proverbs 27:6).

I have never received a painless wound before, and I never will.

However, I would rather face the wound of a friend then open up all the doors to my life to the winds of folly and the wounds of my enemy that always come from a lack of accountability. Proverbs goes on to read, “As iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens the countenance of his friend” (Proverbs 27:17).

Also because of our pride, when we are corrected, we get defensive and try to fight our position or justify our behavior, and sparks will fly every time. When we walk in humility and confidence in God’s gracious desire to be loving, forgiving and benevolent to us and see the reality of love coming from those who seek to speak into our lives as blessings from God’s hand, we can, like the Psalmist proclaim, “Let the righteous smite me; it shall be a kindness: and let him reprove me; it shall be an excellent oil, which shall not break my head: for yet my prayer also shall be in their calamities” (Psalms 141:5 KJV).

So, next time someone who loves us points out one of our shortcomings or an area we need to grow in, maybe, instead of taking offense, we could thank them, pray with them and take it all to the Lord in prayer that we may become more like Jesus and less like our sinful self.

Ty Orr is the senior pastor at Watersprings Church located in Idaho Falls, ID. Ty is married to Laurie, and they have three children.